Getting married in a Koli family is probably the best thing that happened to the ‘fishitarian' in me. Growing up, we had pomfret, halwa (poor-man's pomfret) Indian mackerel, prawn, shrimp and Bombay duck (the usual suspects, I'd say) grace our lunch and dinner tables regularly. And I learnt how to cook them just as well. Patra ni machchi, kolmi no patio, tareli machchi, machchi ni curry...I could make them blindfolded.

After marriage, my grandfather-in-law (who we fondly call ‘Buddie') introduced me to a whole new world of sea food...scampi, betki, palla, levti (mud skippers) rawas, surmai, crab, lobster...the choice I have now is unreal. And the preparations even more so! But there's one basic green masala at the heart of all their recipes - naturally each one has its own variation to give it its distinctive favour. And after four years of cooking for, and with, the family, I've only just discovered it!

Once I'd mastered the masala, of course, I used it to my advantage. In out-of-the-box curries, pastas and even bakes. And guess what, it works! Now, after talking about it so much, it wouldn't be fair on my part not to share it with you...or would it? Naahh!

I'm not one of those hold-my-secret-ingredient-close-to-my-heart kind of cooks. I love sharing the little joys I discover in the kitchen...it only multiplies them! But before I share it with you, please know that there is no fixed proportion. You have to go with your gut on the flavours - that's what makes it your own.

So here goes...two handfuls of coriander, sprigs of mint, a handful of dried red Kashmiri chillies (coz they're non spicy, and very flavourful), more than a few fresh green chillies, a handful of fresh garlic cloves, juice of half a lemon, sea salt to taste and no more than a pinch of sugar. Off it goes into the grinder to make a lovely smooth paste. Variations/ additions to the paste could include fresh bell peppers, coriander seeds, fresh basil, onions...whatever you like! As long as you realise that it's the heart in the recipe that makes it most delicious. Happy cooking!

It left me wondering if my children (two sons) were the odd ones out or if I was doing something wrong - Sharan and Abheer could not bear the sight (we haven't even talked taste yet!) of anything on their plates that included five different colours and was remotely healthy!

Mealtimes with my sons are alternately hilarious and hysterical. Hilarious because I'm done getting hysterical and the only way out is humour. So I'm sitting there, in a newly painted little boys' den, with bowls of spaghetti and other adults-consider-healthy treats, thinking, "whatever am I going to do!"

This was a year ago. Since then, I've gotten smart. I stopped reading preachy parental websites and decided to get naughty for the sake of my boys. What I'd noticed from my trips to the playschool with Sharan was that children learned by example - not the example of adults, at least not in this case. For instance, Sharan wouldn't touch potato chips until he saw his "friend" Raphael munching them.

It set me thinking. I got a bit carried away and set about recording all the possible TV commercials that had to do with children and food. And we'd watch them together during mealtimes, where I brought out the strangest - in my opinion - fare. So we sat there munching "smiley potato fries" in cheesy cheese spread while the kids in the TV commercials drank vibrant coloured fruit juices and ate tempting swirls of pazzta. I give you one guess to figure what happened next....

I must confess, my husband thought I played dirty...but what the hell, it worked, didn't it?!

Now when you're dealing with a certain level of guests - like we were - you've got to be extremely particular about the nitty-gritties. In fact, I look for the God in the details - and don't give up until He surfaces. That is to say, you've got to be careful till the last detail. Because that kind of guest will hang on to the memory of the undone hem, and remind you of it each time you come close to forgetting it yourself.

The most workable mantra for parties thrown for guests like that is ‘prevention'. Don't do anything that will come undone at the 11th hour. Avert the disaster before it can happen. Go simple - it's the key to sophisticated. Better still, it's the trend today! And I love it.

I love the fact that you can do away with the runner because your tablecloth is designed to speak for itself. I love the fact that dry-cleaners today offer a stain-resistant treatment for all kinds of fabric. I love the idea of chic that falls in place with minimal fuss. I love the fact that just enough is required - not too much, not too little. I love it!

Another one of my bull's eye mantras for parties like this one is ‘go with gold'. It's glamorous without being trashy; it's opulent without trying too hard; it's festive without being loud; it's perfect. When in doubt, I go gold. And it works. Try it, without fussing too much over it. Remember, keep it simple and let it do all the talking alone. Your guests will follow!

"It's getting cold!" has been one of my loudest and most oft-expressed fears ever since they started eating regular meals (they're only three and two years old!).

I have to be honest, I didn't realise how good hot food really is for the system until I injured my nose late last month. It was the only thing that gave me any relief! And for the last week and a half, I've been living on hot, one-pot, soupy meals. And believe me, I've loved every slurpy moment of them.

In fact, I'd like to share one of the simplest, but yummiest soupy meals I've had. And each time I made it, I discovered an even more delicious variation. This one's my comfort food for the season!

I USED: 2 onions, 2 tomatoes, 2 potatoes, ½ tsp lite butter, ½ tsp ginger-garlic paste, 6-7 peppercorns, 4-5 cloves, 1½ glasses of water, salt to taste, parmesan shavings (Sharan's added touch)

I CHOPPED: All three vegetables into large dices (you see, I couldn't bear to look downward for too long - pressure on the broken nose bridge)

I MADE: The cooker hot, and added the butter and the spices. After crackling for a bit, I sautéed the onions, potatoes and tomatoes (in that order). The water went in last topped off by the salt. Cooker shut, whistle on and the wait begins. Five whistles later, cooking goes into simmer mode for three minutes. And then the flame is turned off. Ladle it into a blender for smooth puree. If you like it clear, enjoy the broth as is.

VARIATION 1: Add more veggies. Broccoli, carrots and even pumpkin!
VARIOTION 2: Substitute the onions for spring onions and use the greens for garnish.
VARIATION 3: Add chicken! I threw in a bowl of leftovers, from the previous day, at the sauté stage - it turned out divine!
VARIATION 4: Ladle hot, into the serving bowl and throw in small chunks of cheese. But the soup has to be piping hot for this one to work.

That's it. You can come up with your own variations. And even serve it with crusty wedges of garlic toast. Happy cooking. And of course, bon appétit!

I'd been stressing about the menu for an "intimate dinner for 10" that I was hosting on the coming Friday. And I had my epiphany - Mr Dhanu makes fun of me when I call it that - at the Lotus Café brunch. I would let my guests pick their own menu.

You know how we've always been intrigued by all those cookery shows that promise five different recipes with the same set of ingredients? The live counters at the brunch were doing just that. No wonder they were the most crowded! I was going to try and pull off something similar for my Friday evening.

So I went on an ingredient hunt. A rampage, really. First I hit Nature's Basket, then came all the delis in my area. I even dragged a very indignant Mr Dhanu for the dinner buffet at Vista (Taj Lands End, Mumbai) for ideas. Apart from a very bothered husband, I came away with some good observations and workable ideas for my own dinner party.

With only 10 people invited, it was easy to make the calls to find out how many preferred veg and how many non veg. That done, I figured Italian was probably the most adaptable cuisine. So an Italian feast it would be!

Now there's one thing you have to know about me. As much as I love cooking, I enjoy entertaining. Meaning: I want to spend time with my friends when I call them home - I don't want to be hung-up in the kitchen all evening! That's why Italian suited me just fine and live counters and self-service got a high five!

Thursday morning was dedicated to Nature's Basket - I took Sharan (my older son) along for company and colour. Of course, I brought the list with me - making a list good list is very important; it's half the battle won! First we picked the pasta - spaghetti, fusilli and farfalle. Then we picked out the sauces. Three for choice, and all in different colours. So we got a jar of pesto, one of brown mushroom and one glorious arrabiata. All the cold cuts, sauces, dips, drizzles and cheeses came next. I did well to remember the one thing my husband insists on when it comes to serving food - more is good. So I picked a lot! Or at least enough to feed an army. Then we hit the market for the real stuff. Fresh veggies, crunchy greens, crisp unmarked fruits - stuff that would work in salads as well as toss-ups. And we drove home with a full boot.

Friday afternoon, the cutting and cleaning was sorted out. Serving dishes were prepped and kept ready on the counter. Plates and cutlery washed, dried and polished; fresh linen was pulled out from the closet and starch-ironed.

On Friday, early evening, flowers were tucked into their vases and placed where they needed to be placed. Aroma infusers were switched on, the curtains drawn, the candles lit and lights dimmed. One last look around before I stepped in for a shower and started getting ready.

One trip to the kitchen before the guests arrive is a must - last minute instructions, finishing touches, final checks...it's all crucial. Just as the first guest arrived, the grills were turned on and my pastas went into their respective pots to boil.

When my dining table took on its smart new avatar as the buffet counter for the evening, I couldn't help but feel proud of myself. It was going to be an evening of light toss-up meals and easy chatter. Across the room, I caught Mr Dhanu's eye and knew he approved too.